The Whisky Diet: alcohol diet struggles

Showing posts with label alcohol diet struggles. Show all posts

Saturday, November 16, 2013

Mithrael's Manifatso

It's time for me to get really fat--and I don't mean for the holidays. After reaching my goal of weighing 180 lbs on my 50th birthday, I wasn't sure what, if anything, I wanted to do next. Continuing to lose weight was not an option, because, frankly, dieting sucked and I got no enjoyment from being thinner. Maintaining a more comfortable weight, like 200 lbs, would have been the smart choice, but I rarely make those and couldn't find a conviction, like turning 50, to supply the necessary motivation. I was about to settle for "whatever" until one day I was overcome with a fiery passion to become obese...yes, you read that correctly, obese. Why on earth would anyone intentionally run in the opposite direction of conventional wisdom? Oh, wait, that's an answer not a question. Here are some others:

● I'm one crazy mofo (aka father).
● I hate being cold. Hello fat, goodbye fartcicles.
● I could feel my butt bones crunch at 180 lbs. It felt like sitting on marbles. Why pay $1000 for a La-Z Boy, when I could just be one?
● No longer will anyone question why I'm wearing sweat pants--they'll always be in style for my weight class!
● Working out will be far easier. I'll be able to break a sweat and get my heart rate up to cardio level by just thinking of crossing a room.
● There's nothing like a massive energy reserve to survive major surgery (even if latter was caused by the former), or an apocalypse (even if skinny people are trying to eat you).
● If I can't afford to be livin' large, I might as well be livin' 2-people-in-one large. You know, be all I can be.
● I could have an additional revenue stream as an in-store Santa, "before" model, or rent-a-bounce house.
● There's too much social pressure *not* to be obese--like my 5-yr old, I hate being told what to do, even if it's "only a suggestion". What's the big deal anyway? Are people afraid of gaining weight from 2nd-hand fat?

But more or less seriously, I'm going to take this more or less seriously. On one hand, I don't have a lot of faith in medical claims about obesity. There are too many variables involved and conflicting research findings to support that. On the other hand, there must be limits to what a body can endure, so I plan to listen closely to my body for mine. I'm not trying to be unhealthy--I'll still clean my arteries daily with a bottle of whisky, and I have an agreement with my wife to have no rolls of fat that I can hide a rash or bologna sandwich in. The only real issue I have with this new course of action that I will be slightly more full of shit than usual.

Happy holidays, y'all!

Weight: 221 lbs (11/13)
Weight: 218 lbs (11/06)
Weight: 215 lbs (10/30)
Weight: 212 lbs (10/23)
Weight: 210 lbs (10/16)

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

My Foodcation

Weight: 195 lbs

Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Last of the Irish

Gained 9 pounds in a week!

Last November, I drank 2 day's worth of Canadian and Irish whiskey in 2-3 hours and got pretty darn sick. On my birthday last week, I ate 2 day's worth of food in 10-11 hours and also got sick. While events like these are undoubtedly stupid, I believe they serve the greater purpose of rekindling motivation. Maintaining a healthy balance forever is both difficult and boring. Extreme negative experiences, even self-inflicted, can create polarized goal posts that we are driven to defend against repeating, at least until they slowly fade into the past. Anything we can do to refresh those negative memories can help renew continuous improvement, and so it is under that guise that I again drink what I previously vomited up on my fleece jacket several moons ago.

A bit farther into my past, I considered Bushmills, Jameson, and Tillamore Dew to be my favorite, premium whiskies. Having completed my Irish whiskey tour, they now taste somewhat bland compared to others--Tillamore Dew being the most distinguished of the trio. But I'm still more than happy to have them on my team reminding me of the past. I really do think it makes me stronger, in my typically twisted fashion.

Weight: 189 lbs

Thursday, July 11, 2013

6 Days Left! -- 183 lbs (-46) [8X]

I am so looking forward to being done with this year-long diet. Regardless of whether I reach my goal of weighing 180 pounds by the 17th (which is looking barely possible), I will stop tracking what I eat, drink, and weigh on that day. I don't know if I'll try to maintain a healthy weight (which for me means staying under 200 lbs), but I suspect I will eat a little more and drink a little less, on average. I will continue to maintain this blog for at least another year, fighting the good fight (the right to drink in moderation 24x7) and occasionally posting bottom-shelf reviews.

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Sunday, July 7, 2013

Concannon & Powers -- 185 lbs (-44) [36X]

With a little over a week to go on this year-long diet, I'm still not sure if I'll reach my goal of 180 pounds. As predicted, self-control has been difficult over the 4-day holiday weekend--the only "saving grace" has been 2 days of dysentery I'm blaming on a bad hot link I ate at our local 4th of July fair. And it is sick, literally and figuratively, that I'm to the point where I'm thankful for such a GI failure--possibly a sign that I am taking this commitment I made to myself, and the 1 or 2 people that occasionally read this blog, a bit too seriously. A sign that I will blissfully ignore.

Concannon & Powers are here to cheer me on and help me push my limits. They immediately changed my opinion of Irish whiskey lacking in variety with their smooth character and strong undertones of butterscotch and caramel, respectively and respectfully. I may be eating like crap, feeling like crap, and, well, crapping like crap, but I'll be drinking finely blended golden whiskey to weather on through.

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Sunday, June 30, 2013

Luck of the Irish Whiskey -- 187 lbs (-42) [42X]

Except for the night I almost killed myself with free Jameson & Bushmills, I haven't had any Irish whiskey on this diet. And I don't have a good reason. Let's be romantic and say I was saving the best for last, because that will be my conclusion as my one-year experiment comes to a close. I can tell you in hindsight, however, that Irish whiskey does not appear to have a bottom-shelf presence--the cheapest Irish whiskey I can buy (Finnegan) is $20 before taxes, and it tastes better than most any scotch, bourbon, or other whisky I have tried. It's no wonder I can't control myself around it.

And I could use a little Irish luck. I need to lose ~7 pounds in 2.5 weeks to meet my one-year goal, and that will be extra challenging with the long American Independence Day weekend coming up. I am not confident that I'll make it, or that I will continue after my birthday, so place your bets now.

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Sunday, June 16, 2013

Do Dad's Deserve Better? -- 193 lbs (-36) [5X]

Starting tomorrow, I start my last push to meet my 50th birthday goal of 180 lbs. My plan? Pretty much how I started almost a year ago: intermittent fasting with only alcohol, protein, and veggies.

So there's this Father's Day campaign started by Johnnie Walker about how dads should get scotch, rather than ties or cuff links, as a present. And while I can relate to that sentiment, I'm not sure that we dads really deserve it. First of all, this isn't very practical, since only the mom can legally buy alcohol, and any self-respecting mom isn't going to walk into a liquor store with kids in tow. Second, we made a choice to sacrifice certain things when getting married and raising kids, and our wife and kids shouldn't be asked to pay tribute for that. I believe we should still buy and drink scotch--we owe it to ourselves--but nobody else "owes" us. The thought behind a tie is fine, even if we don't wear ties.

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Sunday, May 26, 2013

The Shape of Things to Come -- 191 lbs (-38) [11X]

I seem to have gained 2-3 pounds this month, on average, probably from lots of donuts, pizza, and other starchy/fried foods. It just goes to show that alcohol is no diet pill--I never said it was. My thesis has always been that you don't need to cut out alcohol in a diet, rather it helps in metabolic and psychological ways and has additional health benefits. YOU NEED TO ACTUALLY DIET in some fashion (or exercise) to lose weight at this age--you can't just eat whatever you want whenever without compensating somehow, as I have been recently. If it weren't for my birthday (7/17) looming so close, I can totally see myself careening back into my old pot-bellied self. That's too bad, really, because maintaining a healthy BMI could go a long way in extending my second life, but I don't see any motivation anchoring me to that after I turn 50. I'm just an Orson Wells at heart, but for now, it's back to the business at hand. I'm running out of runway and heading in the wrong direction, so let's see if I can't cut out donuts et al for the remainder of the duration... starting after this holiday weekend and taking off Father's Day, that is :-).

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Friday, May 17, 2013

10 Months Down, 2 To Go -- 190 lbs (-39) [12X]

When I started this diet, I told myself that it was only one year out of my life, and it would be over eventually. The first 4 months seemed to go quickly, but the last 6 feel as if they have stretched on forever--and I still haven't achieved my weight-loss goal of 49 lbs by my 50th birthday on July 17, 2013. Somewhere along the line I modified that goal to weigh 180 or less *on* my birthday, and that has had the interesting side-effect of enabling me to put off losing the last ~10 lbs until the last possible minute (weeks, really), yet motivating me to stay within 10 lbs of my goal at the same time. I'm having a hard time with that last part this month, however, because my work place has started carrying Snyder's hot buffalo wing pretzels. Of all things, I have little or no resistance to this evil, starchy snack. I try to keep it out of the house for that reason, but now Fate has decided to stick this in my face Monday through Friday, which are supposed to be my weight-loss days. And I know it is Fate, because this is a relatively obscure product, and there is really no good reason to put it in a vending machine unless it is to TAUNT ME. So I may find myself drifting farther away from my goal before Father's Day, after which I vow to cut out all starch until my birthday. It's only one month out of my life, so how hard can it be?

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Thursday, March 21, 2013

God Made Me Buy A Donut -- 186 lbs (-43) [26X]

It had been sunny all yesterday morning, but, as soon as I went for a walk, it got cold and miserably windy. Half way through my route, it started raining like crazy, so I ran into the closest building, where they happen to sell awesome apple fritters. I've been trying to eat low-carb (not counting alcohol, of course) for over a week now, but the past few days haven’t gone so well: on Sunday, I ate Irish soda bread; on Monday, MOD pizza; and on Tuesday, a whole bag of popcorn. I was psyched up for an all low-carb day yesterday, until Mother Nature chased me into that donut-wielding shop, and I can't resist a crispy, dark apple fritter when it is staring me right in the face. And this was no ordinary donut, either. As soon as I bought it, the rain stopped and the sun came back out shortly afterwards.

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Thursday, March 7, 2013

Rationalization Creep -- 187 lbs (-42) [22X]

Somehow the phrase "Rationalization Creep" makes me think of a zombie that eats its own brains (not that I feel that way). It also describes my current phase. With each passing week over the last several months, I seem to be rationalizing some new behavior that deters me from reaching my weight-loss goal of 49 lbs (weighing 180 lbs or less) by July 17, 2013. This trend started when I took 2 weeks off of alcohol and allowed myself to eat whatever I wanted whenever I wanted it. Then I gave myself a pass in December for the holidays, which was subsequently extended to rebuild my muscles and strength due to a long-term shoulder injury. After that, I decided that seeing how much I could pig out without gaining weight was more fun than losing weight to pursue my original goal. And finally, I decided to suspend the whole thing, believing I could lose the last 5-10 lbs starting a few weeks before July 17.

The amazing thing is, all of these rationalized behaviors have not adding any average weight gain, which provides no incentive whatsoever to change course. Damn, I've just rationalized these rationalizations.

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Hail Mary Play -- 188 lbs (-41) [18X]

My most recent strategy of returning to a wider variety of alcohol and mixes hasn't significantly changed my 3-month holding pattern*, and I am pretty much out of whisky-diet-consistent ideas to break away from it. I thought that cutting out the protein supplement might do the trick, but as I look over the past month's data, the days I started with a protein drink had no correlation with weight change (it pays to keep good records!). So, in the grand spirit of procrastination that defines my personal style, my new plan is to do nothing substantially different until the last “minute”. I figure as long as I stay within spitting distance of my goal, I can get radical during the last few weeks. It is a risky, hail Mary play, but then there are few forcing functions stronger than an actual deadline.

*For those just tuning in, my goal is to weigh 180 lbs on my 50th birthday (July 17, 2013), but I've been fluctuating between 183 and 189 for the last few months.

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Thursday, February 7, 2013

Crown Royale Maple -- 186 lbs (-43) [23X]

If you've ever gotten violently ill and then never been able to eat or drink what went out through the in door, then you may appreciate my re-opening my heart and stomach to Canadian whisky and Irish whiskey after only a few months. To mark the occasion, I decided to try something extra special and go with Crown Royale Maple, thinking the maple would be subtle in the long-standing tradition of whisky undertones. Well, it's more like Aunt Jemima sitting on your face--smothered in syrup with a hint of whisky.

If you are a sissy but want to look cool drinking your whisky neat, then this is for you. Otherwise, stick to unadulterated stuff. In all fairness, this whisky mixes well with club soda, which is part of my current strategy to distract myself from pigging out. But thank god I didn't get sick drinking this straight up, or I'd never have eaten a pancake, waffle, or maple bar again. Or would that be a good thing? Hmmm ...

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Sunday, February 3, 2013

Fall Risk -- 188 lbs (-41) [15X]

I could have died from drinking too much a few months ago. I could also die every time I ride in a car or cross a busy street, which I do every day, but being intoxicated significantly increases those and other risks, such as falling down and hypothermia. Of these, the risk of injury due to falling was probably highest that night, and I did, in fact, take a nasty fall. Not that I remember doing so, mind you, but I had a terrible, painful bruise just north of my buttocks that lasted for about a week (another clue was that the hospital strapped a "fall risk" advertisement around my wrist). It turns out that the average risk of dying from a fall is pretty high, about 1 in 200, which I find a bit surprising. But then, I've had several alcohol-related falling accidents in my past that could have done me in. One, in particular, stands out.

One evening in my senior year of high school, I met my best friend (Jamie), his step-brother (Jeff), and Jeff's jockish friend (let's call him Brent, for lack of a better memory) at one of those cheap traveling fairs, where we somehow hooked up with 2 girls. Jamie claimed one of the girls, and Brent the other. I was never a "player" in these get-the-girl games, but something about Brent rubbed me the wrong way such that I kept saying things to piss him off in front of "his" girl, so we were already on bad terms when our private party moved to a dark, empty golf course high atop a hill, with a flashlight and all the liquor we could carry. We were walking near a fence, beyond which was pitch black, when Brent said something to the girl, and I stupidly said "he's just saying that to get into your pants". Brent raged "I'm going to kill you!" and bolted towards me, and I, without thinking, leapt over the fence. Well, it turns out the fence protected us from a very steep ravine, which I soon found myself hurtling down. Luckily, I managed to avoid Sonny Bono's fate of hitting a tree. Instead, I stopped just short of landing in a creek and jumped up laughing and unscathed. After that, Brent avoided me because I was too weird/crazy.

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Monday, January 28, 2013

Mixing It Up -- 188 lbs (-41) [14X]

I tried fasting longer on work days last week, but I may have eaten more at night, so I'm not sure if there was a net benefit. Regardless, I macked out Friday through Sunday, once again ending up high for the week. Telling myself to pig-out less isn't going to make it happen--I need an actionable strategy to break my current okay-but-not-great seesaw pattern.

In the beginning of November, I cut wine out of my diet, and a couple of weeks later, I cut out beer. I thought that sticking only to whisky might be even more effective at weight control, because distilled liquor does not contribute any glucose to one's body. I also stopped mixing whisky, and since one can only consume about 1.5 oz per hour without getting intoxicated, drinking it straight-up leaves plenty of spare time for eating. Plus, it is not a good appetite suppressant by itself. When I started this diet, I had no issues mixing a cheap whiskey like Evan Williams with coffee, diet soda, light beer, or even noodle broth. By getting all esoteric about whisky, I may have lost an important regulatory function that mixing liquor, or drinking lower alcohol content beverages like beer and wine, serves.

So there is my new/old strategy to try in February: stretch my alcohol across time by mixing whisky/whiskey more and welcoming light beer and wine back into my diet. That may be the actionable key to less feeding frenzies at night and grazing on weekends.

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Sunday, January 20, 2013

The Happy Pig -- 188 lbs (-41) [12X]

I've been a complete pig this week-end. I thought I'd have better control after the holidays, but that isn't happening so far. I find myself playing a more fun version of the Whisky Diet Game where the object is to eat as much as possible without gaining weight. Being able to pig-out and stay under 190 lbs is making it hard to switch back to weight-loss mode, but I figure that a couple days a week of fasting longer or not pigging-out might be enough to tilt the balance, while staying a happy pig.

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Thursday, January 17, 2013

6-Month Anniversary -- 184 lbs (-45) [8X]

Hard to believe I'm halfway through my one-year commitment--it feels simultaneously shorter and longer than 6 months. I've been within spitting distance of my goal of 180 lbs several times in the last 2 months, and with no parties or vacations in sight, I may actually punch through in the next few weeks. Also, I've mostly fixed my shoulder injury (theoretically through careful exercise and protein supplement), so I'm feeling pretty good all around.

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Back To Work -- 190 lbs (-39) [6X]

I managed to alcohol surf through most of vacation and maintain my weight, despite an excess of cookies, cake, and other naughty, nasty carbs. I mostly flopped between 186 and 187 lbs, which is probably a good place for me to be, except I still want to reach more transformative limits this new year. I also did a little nose dive towards the end here--eight bowls of split pea soup is ridiculous and I'm tooting up a storm today.

[+] What I Consumed Since Last Post ...

Friday, December 21, 2012

Vacation Diet Challenge -- 187 lbs (-42) [5X]

First day of vacation and my daughter practiced her artistic make-up skills on me while I cried over a 5-pound weight fluctuation. I should lay off the tortilla chips.

What I consumed Thursday -- 187 lbs (-42) [5X]:
● 12 oz Johnnie Walker Black
● .33 Nissin Cup Noodles w/ grated cheddar cheese
● 9 Pepperidge Farm water crackers w/ hummus
● 3 Banquet chicken tenders
● 3 slices deli chicken w/ slice swiss cheese
● 2 oz White Horse
● 2 oz J & B Scotch
● 12 oz frozen broccoli w/ parmesan cheese & 2 turkey meatballs
● Small portion spaghetti w/ sauce, 2 turkey meatballs, grated parmesan, & slice of garlic bread

What I consumed Wednesday -- 188 lbs (-41) [6X]:
(refilled system, and then some)
● Coffee w/ 24 g Syntrax Matrix Chocolate protein powder
● Trader Joes No Iron Multivitamin
● Scrambled eggs, sausage link, & slice bacon
● 8 oz J & B Scotch
● 16 oz Harbinger pumpkin/squash stout
● 16 oz Mr. Kitty blueberry cask ale
● 2 soft diablo chicken tacos w/ tortilla chips
● McDonald's Angus burger
● Juanita's tortilla chips w/ grated cheddar
● Rold Gold tiny twist pretzels dipped in Jif chocolate silk peanut butter
● Hot chocolate w/ 2 oz J & B Scotch
● 3 slices deli chicken w/ 2 slices swiss cheese

What I consumed Tuesday -- 183 lbs (-46) [2X]:
(voided system, again)
● 12 oz White Horse
● Coffee w/ 2 tsp fiber
● 3.75 oz Port Clyde Sardines in soybean oil
● 2 12 oz Obsidian Stout
● 1 oz Crunchy Cheetos
● Small bowl of lettuce w/ grated mozzarella & parmesan cheese & Newman's Own lite Italian dressing
● Juanita's tortilla chips
● Juanita's tortilla chips w/ grated cheddar & diced chicken
● Piece of almond sugar cookie and gingerbread head

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Taking It Slow -- 186 lbs (-43) [13X]

For the record, I'm being less aggressive about hitting my original goal of 180 lbs after returning to this diet after a 2 week hiatus. There are a number of reasons for this:

● To try and repair a shoulder area injury I've had since this summer, and rebuild muscle mass I have loss*, I am taking a protein powder supplement at least every other morning and eating a protein lunch, which 1) adds more calories to my diet and 2) subtracts any gains from intermittent fasting
● I am planning to make a new video which I want to shoot part of when I am honestly 181 lbs, and I'm waiting until the holiday vacation to start that project, so I am attempting to time reaching 181 lbs 1-2 weeks from now
● I’m excusing myself from avoiding some temptations during the holiday season, with all of the extra cookies and other treats

Given this, I wouldn't be surprised if I don't hit 180 lbs until next year. Even so, I will still have over 6 months until my 50th birthday, and that is a lot of time left for more drama and other fun, and I don't plan to disappoint. Let's call that my New Year's resolution.

*This appears to be working. Despite hovering at 186 lbs, my Ironman weight scale claims I am at 20% fat (down from 22% at the same weight a month ago). Metabolic age ... 39!

What I consumed Monday -- 186 lbs (-43) [13X]:
● Coffee w/ 1 tsp fiber & 24 g Syntrax Matrix Chocolate protein powder
● Trader Joes No Iron Multivitamin
● 4.5 oz pouch StarKist Tuna Creations (Sweet & Spicy)
● 10 oz Famous Grouse
● 1.5 oz Planters Smoked Almonds
● 3 bowls taco-seasoned ground beef w/ lettuce, grated cheddar, salsa, & cup 'o noodles
● Hot chocolate w/ 2 oz Famous Grouse
● Coffee w/ 1.5 oz Famous Grouse

What I consumed Sunday -- 186 lbs (-43) [12X]:
(pigged out again)
● .5 oz Famous Grouse
● .5 oz White Horse
● .5 oz J & B Scotch
● .5 oz Johnnie Walker Black
● .5 Nissin Cup Noodles w/ 12 cheddar cheese cubes
● 5 oz Liberte blackberry yogurt
● 6 mini pretzels w/ 2 cheddar cheese cubes
● 6 mini pretzels w/ Jif chocolate silk peanut butter
● ~10 Sponge Bob Squarepants Cheese Nips w/ Jif chocolate silk peanut butter
● Half chocolate graham cracker
● 20-30 Sponge Bob Squarepants Cheese Nips
● 8 oz Ballantine's
● .75 large movie theater popcorn
● Bbq chicken breast w/ rice pilaf
● Almond sugar cookie